It is over

Well, for me at least. Having led the music group for almost exactly five years, today was my last Sunday. I can’t say I’m sad, it was time to go. I had reached my limits of massaging everyones egos and finely balancing personalities that didn’t get on with each other. It is with relish that I face the prospect of appearing along with everyone else at about 1 minute before the service rather than 1 hour, of being able to go and drink coffee with the masses after the service, rather than once most people have left. Of being able to go up the hill when I feel like it (though that is a shockingly early start), and sometimes just taking a Sunday off because I feel like it, not because I will be actively else where.

This departure hasn’t come suddenly, I made the decision to leave in January and now seemed to be the first possible time for me to actually stop. I’ve had plenty of time to get used to going and after my initial decision things seemed to improve and I began enjoying it a lot more. The last couple of weeks have been rather difficult though – one of the key personalities has thrown one of the biggest wobblies ever (did I blog about it?) and at that point it took all my will-power not to snap back that with people like him it wasn’t really surprising that I was giving up (one of many of his gripes was my leaving – though I suspect that if I hadn’t been it would have been his gripe that I was still there!)

I suspect before too long I will miss singing with the group on a Sunday morning, but equally know that I, and they, need a complete break before I can think about joining them as a singer, the people in charge need to get used to being in charge and not feel that they are upsetting me by doing things differently – one person that is in group leadership (it takes 3 people to do my job!) wouldn’t even consider me, but the others may not feel comfortable.

So in a few months don’t be surprised if I say I have gone back.

0 thoughts on “It is over

  1. well done – having been in similar circs … don’t be surprised if you don’t go back! God has amazing way of moving you on (and you thought YOU did it!) and filling up your life with all sorts of other things that you hadn’t realised were out there waiting just for you! In the mean time, enjoy being "just" a member of the congregation 🙂

  2. And well done from me too. A hard decision I am sure. Enjoy the time off and enjoying coffee with the masses!